Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Christmas Gift Ideas from Chris

You know I miss you all in blogger land.
I'm a little behind in my Christmas preparations so I can't spend much time with you.  (Yes, I know- I look very old and my hair is very short.  Read back a few posts to understand my problem with anxiety and hair cutting.)

But its that time of year where "pleasers" like myself feel obligated to not just "make people happy" but to make them "over the moon in joyous rapture" at their gift.  
See Exhibit (A) below.
Yes, that is Chinamommy.  

Now see Exhibit (B) below.

Eeesshh!  Wowsza!  She couldn't even fake liking her Pareo.  (That's a fancy name for scarf big enough to wrap yourself in.)

"Why don't you like it?"  I whined?  "Its a very popular color scheme!  See?"

See?  Even major industries approve of this attention grabbing color scheme. 


And speaking of attention grabbing...That yellow is a safety feature built right in!  See?  The very same shade is used to mark dangerous curbs so people don't trip right into oncoming traffic!  And to guide you into the nearest gas station when you need to fuel up.


Well, Christmas Children everywhere, it was a bad deal.  No sale.  So, to save you the dis-appointment of being the "BAD gift giver" I have decided to offer up some suggestions for gift ideas.

I'd like to start with the "Forever Lazy" Jumpsuit.  Its warm and snuggly.  Its for grown ups.  You don't even have to take it off to go potty 'cuz there are places that unbutton for things like that.  You can go anywhere in this little outfit.  Like the nearest "All You Can Eat" buffet. 

Next- here's the very next "As seen on TV" invention- be the first to own one-
THE HILLBILLY CORK SCREW
(And yes, that is Kristi, from Cheeky Green Designs)

Cuz, sometimes, you have to get that bottle open, no matter what.....
This handy device comes in several stages of decomposition- from slightly rust to very rusty to covered in grease and oil.  Trust me, standards ARE flexible when necessary.



If you don't like those choices or your recipient is male consider this.....


Or....a favorite every year.....SPAM Sandwiches!!!


But all in all, you shouldn't worry about your gift choices too much.  Christmas isn't about that.  Its about moments.  Like this one.

Just in case you don't hear from me before hand- I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas.

8 comments:

  1. :) What a fun post! I have actually been trying to talk "Chinamommy" into getting a "Forever Lazy" I'm thinking of wearing mine to the movies.

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  2. Angela- Please, Please wear yours to the movies but take video. Please!

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  3. Very funny, I have a few of those corkscrews lying around here... You look lovely even with short hair.... have a great Christmas...

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  4. I am totally jealous you got to see Chinamommy...she's one of my favorite peeps!!

    Off to read more of your Blog and see what I have missed the last couple of week! So glad you popped by for a visit!

    Happy Holidays, Fa la la and all that stuff!

    LuLu~*xoxo

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  5. p.s. I think you hair looks great.

    :)a

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  6. i love that i am showing off ALL my dental work!! what am i, an osmond?

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  7. Great! Love the Spam and Salmon burgers logo!!!They Would both be a big hit in my family, but i will make handmade gifts and make them pose and have their pictures taken with them for my blog and etsy!

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Thank you for visiting with me:)