Sunday, December 27, 2009

"Always" and "Never"

I vow to wear nothing but pig-tails and pajamas- Always!

I am not quite sure who to site for the following material but I take my best guess as Daniel Goleman who authored the book Emotional Intelligence. I found it as part of another compilation of material.

There are two words which the emotionally intelligent should excise from their vocabulary because they are dangerous, destructive lies. They are "never" and "always". No one is "always" or "never" anything. People have irritating habits, destructive vices, bad traits which surface from time to time, prejudices founded on ignorance, but they are people, not monsters, for all that. "Always" and "never" turn criticisms: "That is a thoughtless act" into insults - "You are always thoughtless"; and insults , because they cannot be answered with reason, are nothing short of violence, which breeds violence in its turn. "Always" and "never" do violence to the person who thinks and speaks such nonsense, because in time, he or she begins to believe it, and his or her head becomes crowded with mythological monsters .

Why I felt this was blog material is- well because-its my blog. I must take every opportunity to remind myself of lessons learned. I am very forgetful and while I try to be the best self I can I easily slip into what I could call "darkness and angst". If we, and believe me-I do try, live in the "light of the truth" then life should be relatively calm and free of angst. I do try to be honest with myself and the best way to do this is by keeping things simple. Truth is simple. Truth can never be more or less than truth. In that essence it will never let you down. You can screw things up by putting your own slant on the truth but that is you. Nope, truth will not lead you down a path of misconception. It actually won't lead you anywhere- it can't. But seeing and knowing the truth gives you the ability to make appropriate decisions, have appropriate reactions, have appropriate attitudes. I believe that you can't get anywhere emotionally in life if you are not starting from a point of honesty with yourself.

Does that make me a perfectly happy person? Absolutely not! Why, I would never insinuate such a lofty ideal! I always present myself exactly as I am! Honest, I do, I wouldn't lie about it!

"Always" is a lie. "Never" is a lie.

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