Because I know you are all dying to know more about me-
What do I really appreciate right now?
This kid, as always, astounds me with her personality and beauty. I know, every kid is beautiful to their parent. She was beautiful to me when she was born premature and looked like an alien. The nurse who was holding her made that likeness but as I gave her the "I still have tons of pregnancy hormones running amuck" look she quickly explained "pre- mees either look like aliens or monkey babies." I decided alien was OK.
What's weirding me out right now?
The kid from the above statement has taken to making weird breathing noises while she eats. I've tried everything to get her to stop. I'm really sensitive to noises and really particular about eating habits- not mine, other people's. My last attempt to get her to quit was "STOP doing THAT- people will think you're retarded!" To which she responded "What's retarded?" and then I had to explain its a word that people don't use anymore to describe people that ride the short bus. Surprisingly, she still makes the noise.
What's cracking me up right now?
This episode of "Sunny With a Chance" (teeny- bopper show, hate them all but this episode was too funny for its viewers to appreciate- only a weirdo like me truly gets it!) wherein one of the characters is a teen idol who was setting a fashion trend of wearing extra skinny pants. Trouble was they were cutting off circulation- a condition newly classified as SPS- skinny pants syndrome.Being an 80's teenager I love the chance to laugh at tight jeans coming back into fashion. The starlett was forced to wear these blow up pants to cure her syndrome but after being caught in them she ran off and put the skinny pants back on. Her caring friend commanded "Put on your medicine pants!" (That's a funny statement right there!) but Starlett refused and promptly fell down as her circulation became compromised. Undaunted she declared "I'd rather crawl HOT than walk UGLY" Seriously- Why didn't I write that episode? Still cracking me up, days later. I think I'll go get me some medicine pants!
What am I doing to be more healthy?
Take this Healthy Thinking Thursday Group! I'm walking (not fast, I'm not crazy) on the treadmill!
What am I doing to make the most of my time?
Trying to do art while walking on the treadmill.
How's it going, you wonder.....not well. My sketches are very sketchy and laying the sketch book on the thingy where the numbers are you know, pulse, mph, calories burnt- whatever that's called-keeps restarting the timer so I have no idea how long I've been on there but I suspect its not as long as it seems.
What do I recommend not doing?
Drinking beer while on the treadmill. As tempting as a cold beer may seem after a long hot walk it does defeat the purpose. I am currently conducting a study and will apprise you of the results.
Well, that's all for now folks. I think I will try another 5 minute stint on the 'ole mill and then maybe shop the Internet for some blow up pants in a size small. Not little teenage girl small. Forty-one year old short with an elastic waist band.
What do I really appreciate right now?
This kid, as always, astounds me with her personality and beauty. I know, every kid is beautiful to their parent. She was beautiful to me when she was born premature and looked like an alien. The nurse who was holding her made that likeness but as I gave her the "I still have tons of pregnancy hormones running amuck" look she quickly explained "pre- mees either look like aliens or monkey babies." I decided alien was OK.
What's weirding me out right now?
The kid from the above statement has taken to making weird breathing noises while she eats. I've tried everything to get her to stop. I'm really sensitive to noises and really particular about eating habits- not mine, other people's. My last attempt to get her to quit was "STOP doing THAT- people will think you're retarded!" To which she responded "What's retarded?" and then I had to explain its a word that people don't use anymore to describe people that ride the short bus. Surprisingly, she still makes the noise.
What's cracking me up right now?
This episode of "Sunny With a Chance" (teeny- bopper show, hate them all but this episode was too funny for its viewers to appreciate- only a weirdo like me truly gets it!) wherein one of the characters is a teen idol who was setting a fashion trend of wearing extra skinny pants. Trouble was they were cutting off circulation- a condition newly classified as SPS- skinny pants syndrome.Being an 80's teenager I love the chance to laugh at tight jeans coming back into fashion. The starlett was forced to wear these blow up pants to cure her syndrome but after being caught in them she ran off and put the skinny pants back on. Her caring friend commanded "Put on your medicine pants!" (That's a funny statement right there!) but Starlett refused and promptly fell down as her circulation became compromised. Undaunted she declared "I'd rather crawl HOT than walk UGLY" Seriously- Why didn't I write that episode? Still cracking me up, days later. I think I'll go get me some medicine pants!
What am I doing to be more healthy?
Take this Healthy Thinking Thursday Group! I'm walking (not fast, I'm not crazy) on the treadmill!
What am I doing to make the most of my time?
Trying to do art while walking on the treadmill.
How's it going, you wonder.....not well. My sketches are very sketchy and laying the sketch book on the thingy where the numbers are you know, pulse, mph, calories burnt- whatever that's called-keeps restarting the timer so I have no idea how long I've been on there but I suspect its not as long as it seems.
What do I recommend not doing?
Drinking beer while on the treadmill. As tempting as a cold beer may seem after a long hot walk it does defeat the purpose. I am currently conducting a study and will apprise you of the results.
Well, that's all for now folks. I think I will try another 5 minute stint on the 'ole mill and then maybe shop the Internet for some blow up pants in a size small. Not little teenage girl small. Forty-one year old short with an elastic waist band.
Ha! Great post, and your daughter is beautiful, even if she does weird breathing noises. I do some weird ones too when I'm trying to relax and my sisters says I'm grunting, but it's more of a breath counting thing. I can't explain it. See if you can get a 2 for one on those pants. Chinamommy probably needs some too. If she can rock that bikini, she needs tiny pants.
ReplyDeleteAnd beer on the treadmill is never wrong. Just go with the lowest calories. I think there is one with 55 calories now. Hops and barley are veggies, right?
WOO HOO for you on the treadmill. Curse the calories in beer and wine,right??!! I've heard it's not too healthy to exist on alcohol and crackers too :(
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is beautiful! I cannot believe any nurse would ever be stupid enough to tell a new mother their child looked like an alien! She's lucky you didn't slap her!
I have to laugh at what is weirding you out right now.....I am so absolutely crazy/psychotic about the noises people make when they eat! I have been known to leave a store without what I need because I could not stand the gum chewing of the person waiting on me one more second. Don't even get me started on potato chips and a person that doesn't close their mouth when they chew!
You must be incredibly coordinated to do art on the treadmill! I'd be flat on my face!!
and....the skinny pants. Remember laying on the bed and laying as flat as you could to zip those babies up? Thanks for my laugh this morning Chris- you rock :)
Thanks Mel, I love that you get the whole beer/treadmill thing. I think hops and barley go under the category of grain. I will have to look into it. I sigh a lot- drmatically- it bugs people around me. Tough I say, its not about you!
ReplyDeletei want to be in your Beer-group, but remember it was my NY resolution (to find "my" beer) a few years ago and i just can't stand it... Merlot please!
ReplyDeleteThis post is one of the many reasons I LOVE you!! and She DID look like an alien baby, but in a cute way, of course! :)
xoxo
~cm (who can't stand noise of any kind and does, in fact, own skinny jeans)
Misschell- do you want your medicine pants delivered to your house? SPS is dangerous condition- take it from me.
ReplyDeleteKim- I do remember laying down to zip up the jeans. Also I had a doctor lecture me about tight jeans and the dangers of not enough air flow! Too funny!